Tuesday, December 6, 2011

I, The Bizarre Alien

Ah, here i sit at my old table my Grandparents had for a very long time . I think this table is over 40 years old or more . A nice old wooden table that used too be able too extend too make it longer but alas i've barely ever done this as i've never had the room and i am the only person who sits at it anyhow, so wahhhhh . So here i am thinking about life, it's ups and downs, goods and bad and i wonder what the hell it really is about . You're born, you live you die . Whoop-de-doo! I've been thinking alot about my mortality lately and before someone gets the idea i am thinking of death, yes i have been and do quite often thank you but no i am NOT talking about suicide so please get that out of your mind . Why is it when someone talks about death, the word 'suicide' comes up? What pisses me off is the fact that i DO think about that also but it doesn't mean i'm going to do it . One of my personal philosophies and favorite sayings is, "I live to spite my enemies" and "the less there are of people like me the more there are of the so-called 'normals'" . why is there something wrong with being in a funk? why is there something wrong with wanting to be alone? Why does everything have too be so frikkin' LA!LA!LA! Give me a BREAK, PLEASE!!! I have been questioning everything since i was a wee lad and i will continue to do so at the cost of making enemies . I don't care! I have my own beliefs, dreams, thoughts, hopes,etc. and will continue to do so until the day i have expired from this accursed planet called Earth . I have always done my own thing . I am not interested in whatever the new "hip" trend is . I am not compatible with women, i am not a party animal, i am not a "stud", i am not "cool", i am not whatever this system wants me to be tho i am a slave to the machine and always will be unless i escape into the woods or another planet which i hope to one day! I have offended people with music, noise, art, comics, movies, and so-forth that i enjoy and i do NOT care because i will stand by what i am into! I enjoy the sounds of GG Allin, Mentors, Whitehouse, Sutcliffe Jugend, Rupture, Gut, Torsofuck, Gwar, Carnivore, Stormtroopers of Death(S.O.D.), Anal Cunt, and many other 'offensive' and 'non-P.C.' bands! The whole "p.c."/'anti-p.c.' thing makes me laugh! What a crock of crap in my eyes! If you don't like something, don't look at, listen. or experience what it is that offends you! Believe me, there are many things i personally find offensive and you know what? I IGNORE them tho it's very hard to escape the sounds of christmas music when i am downtown or at work . There is a song by Godflesh entitled "L.I.E.(life is easy)" . Truer words could not be spoken! I am frustrated with myself quite often but what can i do? Give up? No . I REFUSE! I am not happy with myself for my faults but all i can do is do my best to fix my problems . It is easier said than done but i know i can do it because only YOU can win the battles that are within! In my case, ME . I am grateful for meeting Chuck Palahniuk 3 years ago and for some odd reason i brought the package he sent me to work and i looked at the contents which included a very nice cool letter, 2 cds of him telling some of his stories, candles, a fake dog turd, mini bottles of  hot sauce, a "wipe away the sins" mini disposable wash cloth, seeds for various plants, a bunch of glitter that he purposely placed in the box too 'get stuck in my carpet' as he put it, and a stuffed lion too 'protect' me! The coolest thing, aside from the very kind/cool letter was a homemade necklace that he made me, "Too Charles Styles from Chucky P" . A very nice cool necklace made with precious stones and beads . My thank you to you Mr. Palahniuk for such kindness and sincerity! would Stephen King do something like this? I think not! Opening this box again made me feel much better than i have lately and for this i thank this great writer and human being . As a fan of this man's stories, this was and is a great honor for me! I only hope one day too be able to inspire someone who doesn't feel like a part of this world too do their own thing! I hope some oddball kid out there hears my band The Earwigs and wants too make a racket of freak sounds . I want to inspire someone like i have been inspired by my favorite people and heroes! Thank you Mr. Palahniuk, for being so cool and REAL! I will continue too create noise, write, draw, work on short films, and be MYSELF and if you can't handle me for being me, then well,....too effin' bad! I will die one day and i'll be damned if i am going to be something i am not! I will continue too dream of being in outerspace with my alien dreamwoman and i will NEVER stop being what/who i am, CHARLES THE BIZARRE ALIEN F. STYLES . Good day and KEEP THE FILTH, because the faith may let you down but the filth will always be in you! Good night and stay real . your pal from Planet X .

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

A History of The Earwigs pt.1

Hello, my name is Charles a.k.a. The Bizarre Alien . I started calling myself 'Bizarre Charlie' back in 1988 after wanting too come up with my own "name" kinda like "Weird Al" Yankovic . I called myself "Chainsaw Charlie" for a short time and even got a letter from Rob Alinez, the drummer from L.A. thrash/speed metal band Evil Dead(r.i.p.???) addressed too "Chainsaw Charlie"! Anyhow, i always wanted too do a band . In 1986 i heard Cinderella and thought they were awesome . I got their cassette "night songs" for Christmas 1986 and while sitting there, i vowed i would start a band! I tried too do bands with 2 so-called friends that turned into back stabbing pieces of shit i would love too meet one day and laugh at and see if they made it anywhere in life . One guy owned a guitar with a weak plastic practice amp.( i had one also later on! ) and the other guy had a cheap keyboard .  I thought i would be the vocalist and we'd get a bassist and drummer but nothing happened . Should have figured as NONE of us could play anything . Thruout 1986 and beyond, i fantasized about being in a heavy metal band, appearing on the cover of Hit Parader, Heavy Metal Hotshots, Metal Edge, etc. What a laugh! I would stand in front of the bathroom mirror and pose, trying too look tough . Every day i'd sit in my room listening too bands like Cinderella, Dokken, Motely Crue, Van Halen, Alice Cooper, Ratt, etc. imagining i was playing huge sold out arena shows! Not too long later i got more into bands like Celtic Frost, Judas Priest, Metallica, Megadeth, Anvil Bitch, Testament, Lizzy Borden, Anvil, DBC( Dead Brain Cells ) and so on . when  i ended up  in Idaho living with my Grandparents and going too high school, i attempted once again too try and do a band! I met this kid who claimed he played bass . I also met another guy who said he played "lead guitar" . I had just gotten into Sepultura's"beneath the remains" casette so i thought, "Wow! We'll be heavy! I'll be the rythm guitarist/vocalist" and figured all we would need is a drummer! I came up with the name Lethargy because i thought it meant "fast" and i fantasized we'd be a fast speed metal band . ha!ha!ha!  It's the opposite of "fast" . Fast forward later . The guy with the 'guitar' was all talk and the kid turned out not only could he not even hold a bass guitar, turned out to be a total asshole and corn flake! One day i brought my bass AND my guitar in  a military canvas bag! I was so pissed off that i couldn't get a band together and that this 'bass player' was just like most of the people at the school i went to( ie. a so-called "friend" that turns into a back stabbing chickenshit pussy that won't back you up when you're being bullied! Typical WEAK loser! ) that one day i said SCREW IT and i brought my crappy amplifier too school, plugged it in an outside outlet and proceeded too play "S.O.D.'s "March of the S.O.D." too the crowds of students coming into the school! It's hilarious how many of them would not even look at me!  Well, fast forward too August 1990 and i'm totally into bands like Impetigo, Anal Cunt, Sockeye, Ramones, Minch, Hideous Mangelous, Naked Hippy, Nuclear Death, Misfits, etc. and of course my loves, Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, Jimi Hendrix, etc.. I'm living in Idaho still and i end up going too hang out with my best friend at the time for about 8 days! I had brought my guitar and amp. with me .
I'm sitting down in his room and i plug my guitar in and start just going off doing Stevo(Impetigo) inspired vocals, playing my guitar and beating the side of this huge suitcase with my cowboy boots i was wearing! I got so excited i yelled upstairs and asked my friend if i could use his giant boombox and record some stuff . I also asked if i could use the suitcase! He said yeah and history was made with a 5 1/2 or so minute recording with the intro of me yelling, "And now, a kind word from our sponser!,..." and Wayne yelling, "Fuck you!!!!!!" Right then and there, i vowed that i was doing a band even if it was just me! Not too long before this recording, i got a cool letter from Food Fortunata( Sockeye vocalist ) with one part of the letter that said, "I'm convinced that everyone should do a grind band!" A few days later when i was back in Idaho, i found myself sitting in my room listening too the tape again, laughing and wanting too come up with a band name! Some names i came up with included Komabtia, B.C. & The Sickos, The Gorelordz, and some others i can't remember . Sitting there in my room i racked my brain over and over trying too come up with the perfect name, i thought of my hero Alice Cooper  and remembered that his first band in high school was called "The Earwigs" . Right then and there i KNEW then that my "band" was gonna be called The Earwigs and i sat there and drew a cover for the short tape which i titled, "Really short & unofficial aug. '90 reh." The stone was set and in my 1st interviews i described The Earwigs as "created by the nuclear sun"! Eventually i recorded more tapes like the truly horrible "Dismembered( fake "live" 11/90 )tape( complete with samples from Traci Lords "Not of This Earth" movie! Recorded on my boombox with vocals(no microphone as usual!, my guitar and amp(no pedal!) and this time i used the bathtub as drums! The echo in the bathroom gave it a cool slightly echoey sound ), "Stupidity Maketh Thy Idiot!"( with Wayne once again guesting on some yelling and intro.s for some of the "songs"), "Necro-Bestial Cannibal Love Songs"( i got really kick-ass reviews in Food's 'zine Ear of Corn and Mike Duncan/Black Mayonnaise's 'zine Phallic Endopurulence! ) . when i lived in Texas for about 5 months, i recorded "Necro,..." which had 699 songs( i think?) with just me yelling/croaking/gurgling while banging on an echoey ventilator system one day and then i did the "Terror Lurks,..." tape with me on guitar, vocals and hitting a small plastic bucket with a hanger as fast as i could! My brother Derek( a.k.a. "AJ Ricket" ha!ha! ) played guitar on some of the tape and it was pure crap, which fit perfectly with the garbage i was doing at the time!  I did noisecore type total crap until about 1992, then one day when i had only been her ein Spokane,Wa. for a few months i was playing with my rapman keyboard( with microphone), and i thought, "I wonder if i could plug this keyboard into my amp." Believe me, i am STILL not too keen on techical stuff! Anyhow, i plugged it in and was assualted by what i found too be BEAUTIFUL LOUD WHITE NOISE!!!!!!! I ended up recording too what would be my first full on noise destruction tape i called "Undivine interventional mega-deathcrush from outerspace" . I think about 3 people got this tape! Not too long later, i became pen pals with Sean Michael( Fecel-Cide, God's Favorite Band) and he made me a comp. tape that included about a minute of Masonna which literally blew me away! I couldn't believe people were creating such insane sounds! I fell in love with what i was hearing! Soon i became friends with folks like Billy(Stupidity Records/Traci Lords Loves Noise), Richard Ramirez(Deadline Noise Rec.s/Black Leather Jesus,etc.), Dan(Deche-Charge), Manolo(Genital Masticator), Erik(Sonic Disorder/Vaginal Productions), Robert(Bete Noire, Beer Muscles, etc.), George(Nihisticic Productions). Mark(Dolemite & The Jive 5),Rumi(Gore Lunatic 'zine)etc. I had already been pen pals with such folks as Steveggs(Pile of Eggs/Egg Scab Radio), Jim(Minch), Seth(Anal Cunt), Lori(Nuclear Death),etc. Thanks too Richard (Ramirez), i discovered an enire world of total noise destruction, in fact I owe Richard a THANK YOU for the inspiration for calling The Earwigs sound "Alienoise Destruction Musick" . Back in 1996 or '97 i got a flyer from him for a noise show he did and it was described as 'Destruction Music' so hence what i came up with  for my band! Many, many years later,... Over 21 years now i am STILL creating noise, noisecore, trash, destruction, freak sounds, laughter and creativity with my band! A few times i have quit only too come back again not too long later, thanks too good friends getting on my back or just getting very inspired not too quit after all! The Earwigs are a very big part of my life! Sometimes i really think about it and think, "damn! I'm STILL doing this?" I've been told that "noise is a joke" by some people but if that is true, then i must have created one long joke! I have seen people come and go all these years!  People starting noise, noisecore, bedroom weirdo experimental bands just come and go! One day here making tapes, the quitting, or getting 'serious' and doing something that isn't so "funny" . I've seen and known people from a long time ago that LOVED noise, noisecore and related sounds but now have 0 too do with it . I have 0 qualms with these folks! People change, people quit, people do different things and "move on",etc. I am still here and so are THE EARWIGS! I now leave you but will return with A HISTORY OF THE EARWIGS pt.2 this week! Thanks too all who have supported my band/mutant all these years past and present! As always, stay sick & KEEP THE FILTH!!!!!
your pal from outerspace - The Bizarre Alien/THE EARWIGS

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Egyption lover in a poolside mutants house?

I JUST woke up from a dream, feeling groggy right now, coffee nearly ready too drink but i MUST tell of this before i forget,... So here i am living inside a large room with a poool in the middle of the room, about a foot or so deep . I have just gotten some fish and i decide too drop them in the pool instead of a tank so they swim around happily . I wander about the exterior of the pool looking around, watching the fish as they swim .
A few moments later i hear a husky female voice and i walk over and being shy, i lean down and crawl towards a low wall and as i lean up, there is an older slight attractive brunette haired woman talking too no-one . I slink back and when i walk back around the concrete floor, i look back and all of a sudden there are a few men standing around . My friend Tim (Mattson)is there and as i notice him, i look around the room and there are objects, all black boxes resembling square machinery(?) . Tim is talking too some big guy with a beard and flannel shirt, then he looks over and asks, "so, you wanna take a tour of this place?" I say "sure" . I know we are working on High Powered Mutant again . Before we walk away, my buddy Lewis (Pardum ) is standing next too a shelf with stereo equipment on it and he looks over an d as the music starts playing, he sings in unison, "Egyption lover!" Before i woke up, there was a starnge [part in my dream where i just watching the fish swim, and i began communicating too them thru telethapy . One of the fish in particular swam by in slow motion and i noticed she was pure alabaster white with purple fins and a tail . After the song  "egyption lover" began too reverberate thru my head, i woke up!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

WOW!!! Thanks too just reading a friend's blogspot post i discovered that my old blog i started around 5 years ago is STILL here and i forgot all about it! well, long story short i'm back and i plan too post a bunch of stuff! I am very inspired by my friend Robin Bougie's( the gentleman behind the AWESOME fanzine Cinema Sewer ( and now 3 collected books! ) blogspot so here i am! Hope you folks will check out my rants/reviews/stories and whatever i post up! Thanks . It's now 2:30 in the morning and i am pooped after 7 1/2 hours of work! My water is boiling for my food too be made so soon i eat and then it's movie time! Until next time, stay freak, take care and KEEP THE FILTH!!!!!!!! your pal, B.C.A./THE GREAT BEAST HERO!