Nil title

Have you ever woken up and thought, "what in the name of  whatever am i doing here?" Wake up feeling like everything is totally pointless and your existence is a complete waste? Wake up feeling like utter shit, like death is just waiting around the corner any minute soon attacking and suffocating your entire being, seeing the last small light through the pure pitch black dark before your life as you know it has perished like ashes upon the wind, then drowned utterly in a void? Often after i wake up, horrible thoughts take over my mind . Fear, endlessly probing my entire being . Worries making me physically ill too the point of vomiting . Vomiting until tears pour down my face and a bright rash like redness covers my entire face . Fear coming from failure, nightmares occurring every other day due too stress, caused by human beings, caused by personal failures amongst other negative experiences . The fear of death and loss completely engulfs me at times! The fear of life itself, waking up KNOWING that terrible things will happen . A fear of eternal loneliness takes over at times as well as a heartbreaking pain of the loss of a love that could be, but not in this reality .
Reality, what a JOKE indeed! a lame pathetic world it is . I have always been drawn away from this planet in my dreams . The compatibility with most humans nil . The light of the day makes me ill . The night brings me to life . The "rules" of reality are shit to me . One day i will transcend this world and truly live my life . Happiness and light WILL ascend me from the grip of reality and for once i will LIVE!

Mutant Occupied 0.1

I have for years fantasized about living in the post nuclear war age, imaging living a life in the wastelands of the aftermath cruising the deserts in my  armoured car i call the "Death Machine" living the life of a real road warrior, seeking adventure while fighting the good fight as i endlessly search for fuel to feed my death Machine . with the wars raging about the world committed by the poor for the rich shits, it didn;t hit me til a year ago that it HAS been the 'apocalypse' yet i and everyone else didn't notice it til the last couple years when the so-called "shit"  did indeed hit the fan! The asshole politicians became worse than ever, the Kkkops got more brutal, the poor got poorer and the rich got richer! Cities became filthier and more rotten to the core as people just turned meaner and meaner than ever before!
I always considered myself a mutant, a non-human being reusing to call himself a human being . An African man doesn;t like being called a nigger so PLEASE don;t call me a 'human' because i REFUSE to be called one . Anyhow, things were pretty much the same! The new President Asshole brought back punk rock out from the gutter just like in the Reagan-era though for the life of me i can;t remember what asshole was picked by the so-called "moral majority" as new puppet dictator . No big deal!
The United States really didn't turn into a desert wasteland but it may as well be one considering how humans treat the Earth!
Like i said before, i am a MUTANT and i was always incapable of falling in love with a woman form this planet and i never will . Stuck on this planet far too long dreaming about that spacegirl which has now been i;d say nearly 120 years since i 1st saw her at a glance in one of my dreams .
That beautiful faunus told me she loved me so long ago and that i we would be together soon . Yeah right! I haven't had a dream about her in about 10 years ago, and the last one i hardly remember . The curse of love is maddening but i still haven;t given up hope of seeing her and escaping this planet one day!
In the meantime i find myself burning gas across the land shrieking along with the music i have in my machine . GG Allin died in 1993, 139 years ago but he lives on when i crank his punk rock up loud through the loudspeakers i attached too my fine ride!
Diary Year 2139 i am travelling across the old city of Minot, North Dakota . For some odd reason, the lights still work in the city . Many people have told me it's "not good t travel through cities" . Big whoop! I am armed to the teeth and fangs and i'll be DAMNED if i am going to be afraid of going where i want too! Anyhow, i am being a gentleman and moving slowly through the old decrepit street and i come too a red light . It turns green and as i am about to go through the intersection, a stereotypical whitetrash human gives me a dirty look and starts walking in front of me and then,...gives me the bird! I can almost hear, "Yo! Whatcha gonna do, beeeyotch???" That's it! Step on the gas and the toilet bisquit is turned to a pulpy mush! Looking back in my rear view mirror, i see a group of savage humans calling themselves "Bubs" some running out from behind a building and grab the remains of the douche and carry it off too their lair! I laugh and hear one yell, "Blggghhh!!! Bllrrrggghhh!!!!" I press a button and the back end of the Death Machine opens up to reveal my Hellcannons . "Nahhhhhhhhhh! Forget it!" Whatta watse that would be . Live and let live says I! Time to find a place too rest for the eve . Goodnight .

My Dream of a Space Girl

I have been stuck on this planet for far too long . 40 minutes ago i sat outside in the dark staring up at the night time sky gazing upon the heavens seeing stars spread wide across the sky . 2 in particular glimmered and twinkled . I stared at them each one by one wondering if the girl of my dreams who has haunted my mind for the last twenty years is on one of them looking down? I believe love is a curse and if i had the power, i would cut off and burn out the process that generates the feelings of love . For too long it has torn at me . The perfect woman who appeared in my dreams so long ago i still have not seen . Even in dreams the last few years she has not appeared once . Weeks ago i did have a dream in which i was in a place standing ion front of a large dilapidated old house . Appearing in front of me stood a woman in a dark shroud and hood, holding a picture in a frame of the very house . She looks up and a voice  fills my mind  saying, "Gaze into the picture and you may find your dream woman in there . " I stare into the picture and sense her presence but i do not see her at all . My mind fades back into my brain and i wake up .

The Earwigs August 1990 - April 2012

The Earwigs August 1990 - April 2012

The Earwigs were a self described "alienoise destruction musick' band formed by Charles F. Styles otherwise known as The Bizarre Alien, Bizarre Charlie Alien and so forth while visiting his then best friend for a week in Spokane,Washington during late August 1990 . The very 1st recording was done on a boom box using an electric guitar, vocals and cowboy a suitcase for drums . The inspiration for this lo-fi 5 minute recording were groups such as Impetigo, Nuclear Death, GG Allin, Ramones, Misfits, Minch, Anal Cunt, and some others . This recording was also done as a "I am gonna do a band even if it's just me!" . A few days later after many name ideas were thought up, the name The Earwigs was chosen as Alice Cooper was Charles' biggest hero at the time and as The Earwigs was the name of Alice Coopers 1st band . Years later there would be alot of stress and friction in regards too discovering many, many other bands also called Earwig, Earwigs, The Earwigs,.... The name was changed 1 night in the mid 90's too Church of The Rising Xenomorph and was vowed too be only 'total noise' afterwards! This lasted for about 2 hours and The Earwigs were back . During the later 90's B.C.A started a 1 man grind/metal/punk band called Conflagration and recorded 1 tape at Shoga Studio( The Earwigs "studio") which became a split tape with The Earwigs . Conflagration's side was entitled "The Great Fire!"Lp and The Earwigs"Neu Spokane", a near 30 minute Whitehouse style power electronic piece slamming on Spokane,Washington with loud ranting vocals and buzzing noises . The story behind Conflagration is revealed that The Earwigs were bored with doing noisecore, grind/noise and total noise and were going too do grind/gore/metal in the vein of  his all time favorite grind/horror/gore/metal/death band Impetigo that he actually had wanted too do in the 1st place but lack of equipment, talent, no band members and so forth resulted in The Earwigs early sound . After the recording, B.C.A. changed his mind and called the band Conflagration after the NON song . The Earwigs continued too do several tapes and many split tapes with bands such as Pants-O-Rama( this improv. garbage band also included Mike Scientist from Ataxia(now Planar Defecs), Ben L. Robertson and 2 Lady friends! ), Naked Insects, Glog, Sonic Disorder, Mustard Slop, Last Remaining Pinnacle, Ataxia, Bete Noire, Carnal Hedon Coitus(CHC), and others! There were also many compilation tape appearances as well as some video work with some stuff appearing on the Youtube channel much later on . The Earwigs 1st performance was in B.C.A. and Adam(Moth)'s living room in their apartment one summer in 1994 that resulted in 2 people watching and a shelf nearly collapsing on him while he did noise utilizing a Rapman keyboard and microphone with an echo board(???) . A funny note is a member of the local band Civilized Animal was there but left too go "smoke a bowl" . This recording appears on an early recording and is one of the WORST "live" shows to date . There includes a Non-type "cover" and much lo-fi noise . The Earwigs 1st official show was in 1994 in Cleveland,Ohio with Pile of Eggs and Apartment 213 . B.C.A. harassed Steveggs(P.O.E.) nonstop too play a set and then it happened! The "band" was B.C.A.(vocals), Roach(bUNG International - ), Billy Nocera(Stupidity Records/Be A Freak Records now Razorback Records - drum machine ), Mike Duncan( Black Mayoniasse - bass), Steveggs( screaming and running around ) and Food Fortunata( Sockeye - guitar and horrible vocals ),.. this was also the day Sockeye's "Reatreds HISS past my window" Lp came out and when we met Food at the Y.M.C.A. where the show was being held, he walked up too us and gave us each an Lp! The Earwigs 2nd "real" show was at The United Westminster Church in 1996 and they played several more shows there through the next several years till shows stopped being set up there . Many shows with bands like The Fumes(Spokane,Wa.), Intafada, Needles, Fortune Cookie, Blood in 6th Gear( now BruZed ), Ataxia, Earthwyrm and others! Since the beginning, B.C.A. has felt there has been a "curse" with The Earwigs . The reason being has been nonstop problems though the years! Equipment problems, pedals suddenly NOT working at all when they did at home, near fights with people, the fear of playing in front of people, embarrassment due too stuff not working, and many other problems . At one particular show, he could not get one of his keyboards too work at all and this resulted  in him throwing it off a table onto the floor, then stomping on it and smashing while yelling at the top of his lungs . It turns out it DID work but was not set to the correct program . This resulted in an oath too not ever smash any instruments ever again . As the years went by B.C.A. dropped his 'hardline' lifestyle and began drinking beer . Finding out that alcohol helps with loosening up nerves, he would drink before playing a set . Unfortunately all this has done is made him a fool . After 4-5 shows in a row, he told friends, "If i have too drink a bunch of beer just too make me feel more loose and not nervous, this isn't worth it and i am NOT gonna play ANY shows! I would rather be sober and have a natural high " . The very last show on April 21st( 3:00 a.m. at a friends house in his living room ) was yet another drunken noise set . The Earwigs have quit many times . In 1998 B.C.A. told pen pals The Earwigs were DEAD . 2 weeks went by then a phone call from an old friend( Rev. Ogre Snot-Gurgle/Fecal-Cide, God's Favorite Band, Fecal-Matter Discorperated ) called and went on and on how The Earwigs "can't quit!" The band came back the same day . The 2nd too last show was April 12th 2011 with Crank Sturgeon, Pop Culture Rape Victim, Ritual Hate( B.C.A. also did guest vocals for a few minutes! Our sets are also coming out as a split cdr this year! ),and  James Trash & Jim Sparklegirl . James Trash and B.C.A. also did a noise/power-electronic set under the name Die!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that night! The set by The Earwigs was dedicated too his best friend Michael Daymude who had passed away in early March of that year . This line-up included Jarrett Richie( a.k.a. Egomon from The Cindy Margolis is Hot Band) on home made noise machine and Kai( Takedown UAV - now under a new name ) also on home made noise/sounds with B.C.A. on guitar,vocals and noise . In early April 2012 The Earwigs were invited too play a show with Japanese legends Acid Mother's Temple, with locals Space Movies and Hooves and another band called Melting Paraiso UFO . Unfortunately it would be too late for B.C.A. too get that night off but long story short he got a ride and made it too the show only too learn that it had been shut down during the set by Acid Mother's Temple . Originally AMT was going too play 1st and leave early too get too their next show but decided too stay the night! The Earwigs then were going too try and play an 'unplugged' set just using a mega mouth warper and it was decided it could happen if everyone who had stuck around agreed too a 7 minute set! Going next door to the Rainbow Tavern, B.C.A could not get anyone too answer and decided "that was it"  and left in rage! 2 people working at the tavern overheard various people talking about the show getting shut down and offered the bands too play another time . If it had been earlier, The Earwigs could have played after all but it was not too happen! After much talk, The Earwigs played an hour long set right around the corner in a friends living room! The set consisted of total noie, several covers( GG Allin, Dokken, Color Me Badd,etc.), tributes too Johnny Cash, Crystal Skull( leader/villain form the Italian film The Raiders of Atlantis ), a 20th anniversary love song too Gynger Alien, and 2 long noise rock songs with B.C.A on noise machine and Peter ??? on drums that were incredible and unlike anything The Earwigs had ever done! This show also resulted in alot of ridiculous hilarious semi-drunken ranting, freak-outs, rolling arund on the floor, petting a pitbull during the show, getting many high fives and many folks yelling along and manuy laughs and a great time! Unfortunately, this set that was videotaped was NOT to be! The camera, tested several times that day before did not record at all! There was and is 0 audio for this set either! The end of the video had interviews with everyone and their opinions on the show which was not too be . The next day B.C.A. made Egomon an official member of the band and as a "revenge" for the show not being able too be recorded made up for it by recording a 60 minute tape! B.C.A. on noise and vocals and Egomon on noise machine . The last 20 minutes of the tape is just B.C.A. doing total shit/noise/freak noisecore with a previously thought not too be working G-Zilla Noise Machine built by ShNon! The results of this being one of the last recordings by The Earwigs! April 23rd B.C.A is at work after a terrible weekend that also included his bicycle tire going FLAT on the way too work, the camera STILL not working even after testing it numerous times, learning that his lent out NEW Dr. Boss drum machine was BROKEN, losing the new issue of Maximum rock & roll he recieved from a friend( this was found in the back seat of the car sunday afternoon!) and some personal STUPID bullshit occurring that will not be shared here amongst other crap! At work all night the voices came back too just QUIT and he thought about it quite a bit, in fact more than usual . At first he laughed it off but later after riding his bike home, he got online and announced THE EARWIGS August 1990 - April 2012 . Rest in Space . And there you have it fiends . The bullshit is over, the stress is ending and the sadness is tearing at me like a lost friend or love . For The Earwigs, B.C.A. and official and unofficial members,.... Adam Larson(Moth), Shaun Elliot( ShNon ),Mike Daymude(Argo X), Jarrett Richie(Egomon), Steveggs, Billy Nocera, Roach, Mike Duncan, Food Fortunata( Dave Schall ), and everyone who supported the Alienoise Destruction Musick, thank you! Stay sick, tale scare and as always KEEP THE FILTH!!!!!! Gynger Rules!!!

KEEP WATCHING THE SKIES!!!!!!!!! Charles F. Styles a.k.a. Charles The Bizarre Alien. Earth. April 23rd 2012 . 

The Boredom Box

Ladies and Gentlemen, mutants of the pre post-nuke marauding roaming Over Master RULERS of this world, it has come too my attention that i have mot told the tale of "The Boredom Box" . Thanks too my good friend who i will leave nameless as not to embarrass i will not include his name here . He is also incredibly camera shy . Anyhow, the story can now be told, "The Boredom Box" .

Approximately 5 or so years ago i began going too the midnight movie events hosted at Centerstage, held downtown every saturday beginning at 12:00 midnight . For $3 you could sit in a folding chair in front of a projector and view 1 episode of whatever serial was being shown at the time, Flash Gordon or Buck rogers were the usuals, then after the episode, a cult film was shown, some titles included EARTH VS. THE FLYING SAUCERS, SQUIRM, MANIAC(1934), WRESTLING WOMEN VS. THE AZTEC MUMMY, JOURNEY TO THE 7TH PLANET, and many others including one of my very favorites that being a SANTO film( unfortunately i cannot remember the title! ).... While going too these events quite often, i met a young Lady( i cannot remember her name either which may be good but out of respect i shall leave her nameless as well! ) . Long story short, she was pretty nice and cool . I hung out with her at a late night restaurant and had a nice time . She was fun too laugh with, making comments with everyone else at the films shown! Everyone having a good  time . I have had a dream woman for many years . I believe i told her but i also must have offended her, as one evening she asked if i would scratch her back . I offered her my keys and said, "You can use these" . She never spoke too me again and if i remember correctly, i went to one more movie night there and then that was it . Not too long later, Centerstage closed too due financial problems . To this day i admit i feel slightly "bad' but i did not give any hints that i was attracted relationship-wise or anything . I was NOT . Anyhow, before the end of the midnight movie events, this young Lady told me about "The Boredom Box" . The what? I asked .She proceeded too hand me a medium sized brown rectangular box heavily wrapped in clear packing tape . "If you ever find yourself bored, open this!" She gave it to me and for over 5 years or so it has sat in 3 different places i have lived in . 2 apartments, a house and now this cottage i live in . Through the years of having this box, various friends commented on it with wordings such as ,"I bet it's a dildo", "I bet it's porn", and so-forth! Late september 2011 i am sitting here in my living room after a rigorous near 2 weeks of cleaning and organizing in preparation for a walk through so i wouldn't find myself given an evition notice and kicked out! I sat on my couch and looking at the box, i FINALLY decided too open it! With a boxcutter i cut one end of the box and from out of it came 2 packing tape covered packages of varying sizes . Each 1 marked, "Option 1", "Option 2" and "Option 3" . I cut open opion 1 which was shaped odd and very light . Inside, the contents being nothing but popcorn packaging . "Hmmmm,...." i exclaimed . Option 2 shaped in a larger oval shape i opened revealing the following contents 1.) a plastic cucumber, a small squeezable container of KY Jelly, and a can of tuna fish! I laughed when i saw these contents and decided too give the tuna fish too my kitties . I opened it and was about too pour the contents into their bowl of catfood when i thought perhaps i should read the expiration date on it . If i remember correctly, it was 2006 . I quickly threw it away and fund them something else! The 3rd and final "Option 3" was definitely a videotape . i was convinced before even opening it that it was most likely an X-rated film . I opened it and as i began too remove the video cassette form the clear tape covered brown paper bag, i laughed for it was "Barney's Campfire Sing-Along" . So much for thinking that! 7 months later i sit here making food, preparing too eat then drink some beer before i do some e-mails and related internet stuff but i laugh and smile when i think about The Boredom Box . A pretty funny, cool idea indeed! Here's hoping that the young Lady i used too talk too at the Centerstage midnight movies has met someone special and is having a a very cool, good life! Wishing the BEST of luck too you wherever you are! Thank you for reading this! Thanks again too my pal( you know who you are! ) for getting on my back too do this! Thanks also too my favorite writers for inspiring me too write as well! Thank youm goodnight and KEEP THE FILTH!!!!!
your pal from outerspace, Charles The Bizarre Alien . Earth . March 12 2012 .